Monday, November 5, 2007

An Eye Opener

Happy Monday after the time change. Has it affected you?

A new day; a new week; a new cup of tea.

My meditation weekend was very nice, though a little chilly. And I discovered something awful - really awful. I have a phobia. I never really noticed it ever before, but it reared its ugly head at me this weekend and has played havoc.

As a hypnotist who practices what she preaches, I use a lot of self-hypnosis. It has helped me maintain my weight, be motivated for exercise, and be more relaxed when public speaking to just name a few. But I did not see this one coming and it totally blinded me.

I was happily walking along a trail, looking for a peaceful spot in the woods where the sun might shine down for a few moments and I came to a grouping of chaotic rocks. There were big rocks, small rocks, and gravel, all of which to be crossed over. I have decent hiking boots and was not carrying that much, so such a state in the landscape should not give me pause. But it did. I took a step onto the now very narrow trail and felt my foot slide. Mind you, on one side it was straight down. Yikes. I put the next foot in front of the other and it too did not seem stable. At that point, I looked around for another way around this pile and saw no trail. I would have gladly have gone an hour out of my way to not have to pass over this spot. I wobbled again on the next step and watched others pass me effortlessly. I felt myself growing warm even in the chill. My stomach began to ache. I tried to close my eyes and get a grip. No luck, pure fear.

It took quite awhile, but I did make it to the other side and past the rocks. But I began to wonder if this was not some way to help me have more compassion for my clients. I do not believe I have a "just get over it" attitude, but perhaps I have preached so much about hypnosis and phobias, it is now time to cut the crap and understand phobias a little better and what people go through.

And to top it all, when it was time to come back through that area, I had tried some self-hypnosis to get past it. It was not quite enough, thought it did help. I am now at the point where I need to make a recording and listen to it. I am sure I will keep you posted on the progress.

So, I think we will still keep the subject of phobias as a poll question. We had little response to last week's phobia question, so I will just rephrase and see what happens.

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