Solution-focused Brief Therapy

Another nippy morning, still Fallish, though.

There are several counselors who occasionally read these pages (huge welcome) and I have begun to wonder, how many of you utilize hypnosis is your practice? Or perhaps, how many of you utilize elements of the hypnotic process into your practice but do not call it hypnosis? This is not written in a confrontation voice, just so you know. There are several wonderful tools within hypnosis that seem like they would be good in a counseling setting.

On the counseling front, I find it interesting how many people who come to me for hypnosis also really want counseling. I have even been asked if I would do sessions without hypnosis. All I can do is laugh and tell them I can recommend counselors, as that is not my forte. It is then that they will ask questions of hypnosis. Can you use it to help control anger? Can you use it to help with various issues of infidelity? Can you use it to help with marital relationships? And ultimately, depending on the circumstance, the answer is yes.

But there are those, who just really need counseling to even get to a point where hypnosis could truly help. I have had one such inquiry from a gentleman in California. So, I looked up marriage counselors in the San Ramon area or Marriage Counseling East Bay. And this is when I realized my criteria for recommending potential counselors and therapist (other than credentials, licenses and certifications) is that they have to sound positive, be a positive example, have empathy, and the more personal experience is good (realize these are just my standards). Such an example would be East Bay Couples Counseling in California. Jay Slupesky, the therapist, has an interesting background in that he was in electrical engineering. After having his own bouts of marital issues, he sought help. Not only did this help him, but he decided to dedicate his practice to helping others with similar problems. Now, I do not know him and I am basing this off of his web site, but it is enough to know that I would give him a try. (There is interesting psychology here into why one would chose one type of marketing over another).

The other thing that it really important, I think, is what sort of counseling one offers. One that seems conducive to hypnosis is solution-focused brief therapy. This is what Jay practices. It is therapy that is based on creating change (change is ever present, a constant) in the present and future, and does not focus solely on the past. Involving visualizing a potential future, the therapist helps the client plan and make steps to attain this. Seems a perfect match for hypnotic processes.

Many of of us in the hypnotic arts chose hypnosis as opposed to being a therapist for many reasons. It is not a long-termed-based solution, but more immediate. We do not have to spend years in schooling. We do not have to know about therapy in general. But the more I delve into it, the more important psychology seems. I know many hypnotists who are constantly reading about hypnotic techniques, yet I often find the more background I have in various psychology schools of thought, the more helpful I am towards my clients.

Any thoughts?

An Eye Opener

Happy Monday after the time change. Has it affected you?

A new day; a new week; a new cup of tea.

My meditation weekend was very nice, though a little chilly. And I discovered something awful - really awful. I have a phobia. I never really noticed it ever before, but it reared its ugly head at me this weekend and has played havoc.

As a hypnotist who practices what she preaches, I use a lot of self-hypnosis. It has helped me maintain my weight, be motivated for exercise, and be more relaxed when public speaking to just name a few. But I did not see this one coming and it totally blinded me.

I was happily walking along a trail, looking for a peaceful spot in the woods where the sun might shine down for a few moments and I came to a grouping of chaotic rocks. There were big rocks, small rocks, and gravel, all of which to be crossed over. I have decent hiking boots and was not carrying that much, so such a state in the landscape should not give me pause. But it did. I took a step onto the now very narrow trail and felt my foot slide. Mind you, on one side it was straight down. Yikes. I put the next foot in front of the other and it too did not seem stable. At that point, I looked around for another way around this pile and saw no trail. I would have gladly have gone an hour out of my way to not have to pass over this spot. I wobbled again on the next step and watched others pass me effortlessly. I felt myself growing warm even in the chill. My stomach began to ache. I tried to close my eyes and get a grip. No luck, pure fear.

It took quite awhile, but I did make it to the other side and past the rocks. But I began to wonder if this was not some way to help me have more compassion for my clients. I do not believe I have a "just get over it" attitude, but perhaps I have preached so much about hypnosis and phobias, it is now time to cut the crap and understand phobias a little better and what people go through.

And to top it all, when it was time to come back through that area, I had tried some self-hypnosis to get past it. It was not quite enough, thought it did help. I am now at the point where I need to make a recording and listen to it. I am sure I will keep you posted on the progress.

So, I think we will still keep the subject of phobias as a poll question. We had little response to last week's phobia question, so I will just rephrase and see what happens.

Material Request

I am on my last task before closing the door behind me and leaving the world behind. I have begun to do some shopping online for a new digital recorder for the office. The double duty on my one there is getting maddening. I take it home for various things and forget to take it back to the office. Rather than having to make one work for both spaces, I have decided to by another one.

My nephew in the UK has said he wants to present it to me as an early holiday treat (and he hopes I will send him an MP3 of my increasing concentration session). Fair enough. Well, UK pricing is different than the US, and sites that comparison shop are also different. So I have become aware of a new product comparison site in the UK called Save Buckets. I sent that out to him with my request, so we will see what happens. He says he may also try buying a new laptop using the site.

According to a recent article on Channel 4 News, the amount people pay for gifts is staggering. Many are still paying off last year’s debts. So, it only makes sense to comparison shop. But how on earth have we come to this? I understand the nature of giving (and it is commendable), but at what cost? Should be we buying so much in the gift giving sense that we go into debt? Do our loved ones really want that from us?

Perhaps that last paragraph is hypocritical since this post began with my words about my nephew’s graciousness. But, maybe not (or maybe so and I am just justifying it) since it is more or less a trade for my help. And this way he is not beholden to me.

Well, I definitely need to quiet the mind. So, I am signing off until Monday.

Have a great weekend.

Volunteers Needed

Slowly but surely, I am beginning to pack it in - for today. I am heading out late this afternoon for a meditative weekend in the mountains. Just want to celebrate the Fall before winter weather officially sets in and it will be good to quiet the mind for a while.

So, that means there will be no Esoteric Saturday or the Sunday Question. Here is my question to you, as I tend to get restless periodically and head out, it leaves a blank in the blog. Would any of you like to post an Esoteric Saturday or Sunday Question on the occasions when I am gone? This would mean that you would have to come up with references or the questions. If so, let me know by either commenting on this post or emailing me at ellie.blunt@gmail.com.

The Big Bounce

Hmmm. The coffee is not cutting this one. Looking at yesterday's mail, I notice that one my client's checks bounced recently. Yikes. Sadly, this does happen, even to those of us with the best intentions. Many of us have been on both sides of this expensive fence and seen the domino effect it has in increasing bank charges to one and all.

And so, I breathe a heavy sigh. The bounced check is from a client who was recently laid off and is working on self-esteem to get back into the work force. We have been increasing his positivity about this situation and how it is a new beginning, a chance to do what he has always wanted to do (he has yet to figure this out). And now this. Well, guess it will be a test to see how well the hypnosis suggestions have worked to keeping him positive.

You know, though, it rather incenses me. Not the bounced check so much, but the banking fees that he will face. And I know, we can talk about responsibility all day long, but it will not change this that has come to pass.

And you know there is actually someone doing something about this in Britain. Soon their Office of Fair Trade will be doing an inquiry into this and have frozen all claims against banks regarding these fees. For those across the pond, they pay between 25 and 38 pounds for bouncing checks. According to a BBC money program, with the technology increasing efficiency with transactions, the cost should only be four pounds. Think how much banks make on all these Unfair Bank Charges. There is a company there that is now helping people with excessive charges called Keypoint, so that is a positive step.

I really think the US should consider looking into such fees, but I guess over here, we are a little side tracked.

The Who and What's for and of Memory Screening

Memory is a fascinating thing. Why is it that some things are easier to remember than others. For example, I cannot recall a series of four numbers easily, even to the extent of when people hurriedly give me their phone numbers. Even in the two second attempt to write it down, the numbers are gone.

A few days ago, I posted about National Memory Screening Day. Since that time, and a party later, questions have arose about how to tell if you should get a memory screening. How do you tell if it is acute memory loss verses aging? Good question.

So according to the National Memory Screening web site (in case you have not looked for yourself), here are a few questions you should ask yourself:

• Am I becoming more forgetful?
• Do I have trouble concentrating?
• Do I have difficulty performing familiar tasks?
• Do I have trouble recalling words or names in conversation?
• Do I sometimes forget where I am?
• Have family or friends told me that I am repeating questions or saying the same thing over and over again?
• Am I misplacing things more often?
• Have I become lost when walking or driving in a familiar neighborhood?
• Have my family or friends noticed changes in my mood, behavior, personality, or desire to do things?

If you have answered "yes" to any of these questions, you might want to consider getting a screening.

Other questions that I have heard this week include "what is the memory screening process." Again according to the same web site it is as follows:

Various types of healthcare professionals provide memory screenings, including social workers, pharmacists, physician assistants, nurse practitioners, and doctors.

The face-to-face screening takes place in a private setting; only the individual being tested and the clinician are present.

A screening consists of a series of questions and/or tasks designed to test memory, language skills, thinking ability, and other intellectual functions. Screening tools include a Mini-Mental Status Exam, a Seven-Minute Screen and a clock drawing.

The person who administers the screening will review the results with you, and suggest whether you should follow up with a physician or other qualified healthcare professional for more extensive testing.

Results of the memory screenings are confidential. Typically, you will receive the screening results to bring to your healthcare professional or, with your permission, the clinician at the screening will send the results to your physician.

Hit the Floor

Ah, there is always a quiet feeling after an event has passed, the type of event that you put your all into. It used to feel like emptiness and the void would seem all encompassing. But now in my something-like-maturity, it is just a quietness of the soul, contemplative and peaceful.

My gathering went well yesterday and I feel as though the spirit of this holiday was experienced properly.

My weight loss group, in addition to my other clients, seem quite receptive to the idea of Ellie's dance hall, disco, or whatever it will finally be called. As my partner and I mingled through the small crowd in my office, we began to brain storm on ideas for my dance floor. We even went as far as thinking of reflooring the area. Currently it has benign carpeting, but a more danceable surface would be nice. So, after the party ended, we sat down with our spiced cider (and rum) and looked at flooring options. iFLOOR offers a fair amount of information about what to consider in flooring (so much for the "Ellie just wants hardwood floors" idea, now I have many considerations).

This whole thing took on new portions about my garage. It is bigger and might make for better dancing. Apparently a cork floor would be a way to go in locations such as this, as they are water resistant. Plus, I think they would have a bit of give and are better for the bones when breaking into a swing.

The other interesting thing that ifloors is doing is offering a $1,000,000 limited warranty for floor bought online. Apparently this has been a problem and online customers were encouraged not to buy at a discount through the web.

Here is their press release:

Press Release:

iFLOOR, America's largest online flooring retailer, today announced a $1,000,000 limited warranty designed to protect its customers from predatory manufacturer policies that exclude warranty coverage from online purchases.

The policy, which goes into effect immediately, offers up to one million dollars of coverage in the event that a customer's warranty claim is denied specifically because they made their purchase online. It is complimentary for every iFLOOR customer, and protects the buyer under the same terms as the original product warranty.

iFLOOR, Inc. CEO, Steve Simonson, came up with the program to combat "scare tactics" used by manufacturers of hardwood floors and laminate flooring. "Their idea is to discourage you from buying at a discount!" wrote Simonson in his blog "It's About Flooring". "This is not right! You deserve to save money! So we're going to take care of this problem once and for all."

And it would appear that federal law is on his side. Section 108 of the 1975 Magnuson-Moss Act, states that, "In general, tie-in sales provisions are not allowed. Such a provision would require a purchaser of the warranted product to buy an item or service from a particular company to use with the warranted product in order to be eligible to receive a remedy under the warranty."

Under iFLOOR's new warranty, a key provision allows for iFLOOR to "seek justice" on behalf of the customer in the event of legal action. According to Simonson, "I'm putting iFLOOR's money where my mouth is."

About iFLOOR, Inc.
Since 1998, iFLOOR.com has been the leading online and retail flooring company, with 36 local retail stores nationwide offering more than 70,000 products, including hardwood floors, laminate flooring, bamboo flooring and cork floors. iFLOOR.com is the largest online flooring retailer according to Internet Retailer Magazine, and was named by Inc. Magazine as one of the fastest growing private companies in the United States for the past three years. Committed to quality customer service, superior selection and friendly expert advice, iFLOOR.com enables customers to buy flooring both online and in its retail stores at a substantial savings over traditional retailers. For more information about iFLOOR, please visit www.iFLOOR.com.

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